The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey
For some reason I thought this book was titled The 7 Habits of Highly Successful People. I was expecting the habits to be: Go to bed early, Get up early, Be healthy, Work Hard, Use a schedule, and Organize. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is much different than my preconceived notions. The 7 Habits are:
1. Be Proactive
2. Begin With the End in Mind
3. Put First Things First
4. Think Win/Win
5. Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood
6. Synergize
7. Sharpen The Saw
I had started to practice Habits 1,2,3,+7 on my own before I even read the book, and I have been reaping the benefits in many areas of my life. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is like a study book and also a lecture. There are assignments and ways to practically apply each lesson. There are personal stories and memorable, engaging illustration. I found The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People to be chalk full of powerful information. It would be a good book to read every few years just to reevaluate your goals and revamp your focus. As Dr. Covey says, becoming an effective person doesn't happen overnight and you can't just adopt a set of techniques and expect lasting results. There are no quick fixes. If you want to facilitate effective change in public life you have to be willing to take responsibility for who you are at the very core of your being. Real change has to start from the inside and proceed to the outside. He defines, Responsibility, as response- ability, or the ability to respond. We are who we are because we have decided to be this way. It is not our parents fault or our environments fault. If outside forces control who we are or how the respond, our attitude or our mood, it is only because we have chosen to allow them that control. We have to seize the ability to respond in accordance with what we have decided are our values. Some people need to hear this message more than others. I am the kind of person that needs to be told, "Stop complaining. Stop blaming everyone else for your problems. Quit being lazy and do something to change the situation." Of course there are things outside our control. Don't waste time worrying about those things. Focus on what you can control. The things you can control are within your circle of influence. That is Habits 1+2 in my own words. Habit 1 is Being Proactive, or taking responsibility for who we are, and Habit 2 is Begin With The End In Mind, or decide who you are. Decide what principles you have and then live by them. Habit 3, Put First Things First, has to do with the 'doing' part of living out your values. We all have time for the things that are important to us. Personal management is a skill that takes practice. We have to learn to differentiate between demands on our time that are urgent verses important. Some urgent things confuse us into thinking they are important but are truly imposters that steal away our time from the authentically important things. Investing time into relationships usually falls into the important but not urgent category, while checking mobile notifications usually falls into the urgent but not important category. Both activities usually take a lot of time. We have to learn to manage ourselves so that we don't neglect the things we value as important.
The first 3 Habits have to do with private victory. The next 3 Habits have to do with public victory. My favorite parts of the book have to do with the private victory habits. Habits 4,5,+6 are almost a natural manifestation of having Habits 1,2,+3 working in your life. Once you realize how to focus your energies on your circle of influence you will begin to recognize your circle of influence when it comes to dealing with others. You can't make other people agree with you or believe what you want them to believe, but you can try to understand their position and their beliefs. With that in mind, put your efforts into first understanding before you try to be understood. Strive for 3rd alternatives in which every participant is a winner. Come up with compromises that accomplish everyone's goals. Don't create a competitive environment where a united effort would accomplish abundantly more. The point isn't to get along with the whole world, but there are people that we should, or need, to work together with, and we can find ways to appreciate the differences we have among ourselves. Because we have differences we have the opportunity to create powerful teams. We all have a variety of skills and opinions, strengths and weaknesses. If we take the time to understand others we can learn from one another. We can compensate for each other's weaknesses and become a monumental force. That pretty much sums up Habits 4,5,+6. I learned some good tips for empathetic listening in the chapter about Habit 5, Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood. Listening is such an important skill when building relationships.
I love Habit 7 Sharpen The Saw. Without Habit 7 no one can sustain the other 6 Habits. Habit 7 has to do with renewal in 4 aspects of your being: the physical, the spiritual, the mental, and the social. Habit 7 ties in beautifully with Habits 2+3, deciding what first things are are putting first things first. My most #1 priority is in Habit 7: spiritual renewal. That, I must take time for at the begining of the day. But, balancing the 4, physical maintenance, spiritual maintenance, mental maintenance, and social maintenance is crucial. We can't over emphasize any one of the 4 or we will end up neglecting some of the 4. We all have a physical body that needs care. If we neglect it we will starve or be incapacitated and will no longer be able to do any good for ourselves or others. And so it goes for the other 3 aspects. We must balance maintaining all 4 aspects. This year I have been implementing the mental stimulation of reading and it has been invigorating. I, also, have been disciplining myself to write a blog post every week, which has both mental and social benefits. I enjoy it so much and I want 'Keeping a Blog' to stay on my priority list. I would like to take a small amount of time each day to have a simple exercise routine. I enjoy exercise and it makes me feel so good. I know it has mental benefits as well as physical benefits.
That concludes my review of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey. I haven't even talked about Production vs. Production Capacity or Management vs. Leadership and Gopher Management Style vs. Stewardship Management Style. There is so much more to this book than what I can say in this review. In fact, there is a whole book more. :) Dr. Covey is well read and intelligent. He quotes a wide variety of writers, philosophers, historians, theologians, policy makers, etc...... There is a moral aspect to the information that he presents. And that is because being effective does require morality. It requires a core values system. He managed to keep The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People non religious, or not subscribing to any particular religion. Which, I am glad of, especially considering that he is a Mormon. I was concerned on the outset with his religious beliefs and read with caution. Thankfully, he kept Mormonism out of his book and there was no cause for concern. I highly recommend this book to all. I really enjoyed it. I feel that because I am a Christian that I have benefited greatly from the information within this book. I have the Holy Ghost on the inside so I am able to have effective internal change. I already have purpose. I don't need a quick fix, but I can learn how to better manage myself. I can learn to understand others better.
